agathaandtedros4ever

Member Since

7th December, 2016

My Ranking Points

1280
    agathaandtedros4ever posted an update in the group QUESTIONS FOR SOMAN 3 years, 4 months ago

    Dear Soman Chainani,
    I am sorry if i afend you but i need to tell you. In the second book when you had Philip and Tedros kiss it kinda made me feel queezy. So I told my mom and she told me if it apperes again than i can’t read Sge anymore and i don’t want that to happen. So I was wondering if you could posibly not put it in books anymore because I really don’t want to stop reading it, but I also don’t want to disobey my parents. Sorry if this seems affensive but I just needed to tell you.

    -Jewels

        taylorofzenovia replied 3 years, 4 months ago

        I’m really really sorry that you had to learn like this and I really tried to stop myself from commenting on this but I can’t help it. I know it’s not your fault that you were raised this way and you were probably queezy cause you weren’t used to it. I know you weren’t trying to offend anyone and you seem like a very nice person and I want you to know that I don’t think of you any differently. However, you need to know this. Love. Is. Love. I know that Philip and Tedros don’t actually end up being together but even a small almost kids like that is okay. People should be aloud to love or kiss or whatever with whoever they choose. I totally understand that you don’t want to disobey your parents, I get that. I just really thought that you should know. I hope you understand that I am doing this in kindness and for the many people who love those of the same gender. They are all discriminated against and it’s very sad and I hope that you understand that I am doing this in their name because I support them and in your name, because you deserve to know that who you love doesn’t matter. Even if it’s a kiss is a book. 🙂 thanks for reading this and I hope you understand why I had to tell you.
        -your friend

          taylorofzenovia replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          Kiss not kids* sorry 🙂

          dot111 replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          Well said. ^

          agathaandtedros4ever replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          no no i am not saying that i don’t like those people I have many friends that are that way and i am ok but my mom read it and i don’t want to stop i love this serise its a ticket out of my issius with my mom lupis extended family hating us but it’s my parents that are trying to protect me. my dad doesn’t want me to be that way because i am part of the LDS church and it doesn’t meet our standerds but we don’t hate the people who like their same gender I think its good that they are expressing themself. But my family is very involved in the LDS church and I nor my family we don’t want to fall away we love the gosple and i love this serise. This has helped me through so much and i don’t want to leave the fandom. Imagine it this way ok so you have your favorite thing and it has helped you a lot and you mom says “If this sertain thing happens again you have to get rid of it.” How would you feel? I understand love and i am glad people are expressing themselfs i just can’t leave the book so i asked if he could stop because it still is helping me and without it i would be lost. I love that you were standing up for what they believe in but i am not judging them because they are all sweet. I do nott want to be mean i just asked if he could stop so i could keep reading it.

          agathaandtedros4ever replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          yes well said indeed @taylorofzenovia

          oliviataylor replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          I couldnt agree more ^ @taylorofzenovia

        moonerell replied 3 years, 4 months ago

        @agathaandtedros4ever

        THIS IS VERY LONG, BUT PLEASE READ IT TO THE END. THANK YOU FOR YOUR KINDNESS.

        I totally understand that you want to continue reading the series because it helped you through hard times, but just think of all of the hundreds, if not thousands of children who are attracted to the same gender who have never read a book where another character is attracted to the same gender. Imagine how many other children that helped. These kids don’t see people attracted to the same gender anywhere, in almost any book or movie or TV show. This may have been one of the only times they’ve ever been represented. And remember, a very important plot point in the first book, the thing that saved the day at the end, was Agatha kissing Sophie on the lips. And that kiss was not romantic at all. People have been kissing people of the same gender in these books since the first one, and based on what you said it doesn’t sound like your mom said you couldn’t read the books anymore after the first one. She probably only found out because you told her. So just don’t bring it up to her again and you’ll be fine. It’s not lying, it’s just not telling her something. I usually wouldn’t encourage this, but if these books are super important to your mental and emotional health, than you reading them and being healthy and happy is more important than you letting your mom take them away because she’s uncomfortable with gay people.

        Also, based on what you said, you ARE uncomfortable with people attracted to the same gender. This isn’t to say you’re a bad person, or that you want to be grossed out by same gender couples, but you are. If you truly care about the gay friends that you say you have, then it’s super important that you start teaching yourself now, as a child, to be more accepting and less grossed out by same gender romance. If you’re grossed out by two boys kissing in a book, imagine what you would feel if you saw one of your gay/bi/pan (bisexual means being attracted to both girls and boys, and pansexual means you’re attracted to individual people based on their features, not a gender as a whole) friends kissing their partner. You wouldn’t be able to handle it, and they would see that you wouldn’t be able to handle it, and it would crush them to know that one of their friends didn’t fully except them for who they are. Your parents may say and believe that they’re protecting you, but they aren’t. Your parents may not realize this or have any intention of doing this, but the concept of protecting your children by stopping them from seeing same gender romance is actually just supposed to stop kids from realizing they are attracted to the same gender. See, people didn’t used to know that people are born with their sexuality. They didn’t know it wasn’t a choice. So, when they saw kids realizing they liked the same gender when they met other people who liked the same gender, they thought that these kids were being turned gay, not that they were always gay and they just didn’t realize it. But that’s not what happened. Think of it this way: You’re a girl who is SUPER interested in the human body and medicine. But you’ve only ever seen doctors who are men, so you have no idea that you could be a doctor. Then one day you see a doctor who’s a woman, and realize that that’s something you can actually do. You seeing a woman doctor didn’t make you interested in the human body or medicine, it just made you realize that you as a woman were allowed to be a doctor. It’s the same thing with being attracted to the same gender. It’s something that’s always a part of you, but most people just don’t realize that it’s possible or OK until they see someone else do it. This is what your parents are protecting you from when they say they’re trying to protect you by not exposing you to any same gender relationships. They may have absolutely no idea this is what they’re doing, but people don’t always realize when they’re biased. And even if they do, it’s almost impossible for them to admit it and correct their own behavior. This is what’s happening to you. You probably don’t mean to be grossed out by same gender romance, and don’t realize having friends who are attracted to the same gender doesn’t mean that you’re not biased. Admitting you’re biased is a SUUPEEEER hard thing to admit to yourself, but you can’t try to change your behavior and become a better person until you admit that you have a flaw you need to change. And being a good person means constantly trying to be a better person, even if it makes you uncomfortable in the process. Imagine if your child ends up being attracted the same gender. You wouldn’t want to stop them or discourage them from being who they are, but if you don’t try to stop yourself from being grossed out by same gender romance now, then you’re going to be grossed out by it when you see your child in a same gender romance. And I’m sure the last thing in the world you want is for your child to think that you’re grossed out by who they are. And yes, there’s a one in 10 chance that your child is going to be attracted to people of the same gender at least a little bit. The likelihood of one of your children being attracted to the same gender increases the more children you have, so there’s a VERY good chance that you will actually have to deal with this. I know it’s going to be hard, and probably scary considering there’s a chance that you may be disobeying your parents in some way, but if you really care about your friends and potential children feeling comfortable and accepted around you, then you need to start exposing yourself to this stuff and correcting your behavior now, as a child. So you don’t end up hurting someone you care about later.

        I hope that this in some way gives you a better understanding of yourself and the people around you, and will encourage you to be the accepting person it seems like you really want to be. Or even if it just helps you decide what to do about your parents and the books. Thank you for truly listening to me and considering what I have to say. That’s a very important quality to have, and people tend to lose it as they get older. I wish you the best.

        Soman Chainani replied 3 years, 4 months ago

        As I’ve said several times, there are no rules in the world of SGE. It is not the real world. There are no labels, no races, no countries, no genders, no nothing. Everything is experiential, everything is invented, and everything is pure fantasy. If there is something that bothers you, it is likely because you are bringing your judgments and labels to something from the real world, which do not exist in the world of fantasy.

          taylorofzenovia replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          SOMAN YOU ARE SO AMAZING!

          fairytalegirl123 replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          Woah. Deep.

          taylorofzenovia replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          Siriously you. are. awesome.

          agathaandtedros4ever replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          I think judgements is a very harsh word. I love these books but when inappropriate things and language are put into the book it makes me uncomfortable. I am letting you know as a young reader this is a subject that I have been tought is wrong. You seemed like someone that likes when your readers reach out. You can listen to me or choose not to. I just know if you continue to put this in “fantacy” it will prevent me from being able to continue to read your books. I enjoy your books but I also have to live a way that makes me happy and feel good about the things I choose to have in my life. I am a bit disappointed that you would label me when you are saying I shouldn’t put labels on your characters. Just something to think about.

          oliviataylor replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          SOMAN THAT WAS AMAZING

        moonerell replied 3 years, 4 months ago

        @agathaandtedros4ever

        IF YOU HAVE ALREADY READ THIS, PLEASE READ IT AGAIN. THE WHOLE THING.

        Soman was not saying you were a bad person, he was saying that you were uncomfortable because of the fact that you are uncomfortable and judge mental towards gay people. What you said in all of your previous comments. You said that you were grossed out by same gender romance (the kiss) and have been taught that same gender romance is wrong. You literally admitted that you were judge mental towards not-straight people, you just can’t say the words directly. Even if you’re disgusted unintentional, you can’t say that you’re happy that people attracted to the same gender express themselves and that you have not straight friends (both things you said in your second comment) and yet STILL say you think same-gender romance is inappropriate and should be left out of children’s novels. You are a child, which most likely means that you’re not straight friends are children, so you have no reason to think that being attracted to the same gender is something only for adults.

        I totally understand that you want to continue reading the series because it helped you through hard times, but just think of all of the hundreds, if not thousands of children who are attracted to the same gender who have never read a book where another character is attracted to the same gender. Imagine how many other children that helped. These kids don’t see people attracted to the same gender anywhere, in almost any book or movie or TV show. This may have been one of the only times they’ve ever been represented. And remember, a very important plot point in the first book, the thing that saved the day at the end, was Agatha kissing Sophie on the lips. And that kiss was not romantic at all. People have been kissing people of the same gender in these books since the first one, and based on what you said it doesn’t sound like your mom said you couldn’t read the books anymore after the first one. She probably only found out because you told her. So just don’t bring it up to her again and you’ll be fine. It’s not lying, it’s just not telling her something. I usually wouldn’t encourage this, but if these books are super important to your mental and emotional health, than you reading them and being healthy and happy is more important than you letting your mom take them away because she’s uncomfortable with gay people.

        Also, based on what you said, you ARE uncomfortable with people attracted to the same gender. This isn’t to say you’re a bad person, or that you want to be grossed out by same gender couples, but you are. If you truly care about the gay friends that you say you have, then it’s super important that you start teaching yourself now, as a child, to be more accepting and less grossed out by same gender romance. If you’re grossed out by two boys kissing in a book, imagine what you would feel if you saw one of your gay/bi/pan (bisexual means being attracted to both girls and boys, and pansexual means you’re attracted to individual people based on their features, not a gender as a whole) friends kissing their partner. You wouldn’t be able to handle it, and they would see that you wouldn’t be able to handle it, and it would crush them to know that one of their friends didn’t fully except them for who they are. Your parents may say and believe that they’re protecting you, but they aren’t. Your parents may not realize this or have any intention of doing this, but the concept of protecting your children by stopping them from seeing same gender romance is actually just supposed to stop kids from realizing they are attracted to the same gender. See, people didn’t used to know that people are born with their sexuality. They didn’t know it wasn’t a choice. So, when they saw kids realizing they liked the same gender when they met other people who liked the same gender, they thought that these kids were being turned gay, not that they were always gay and they just didn’t realize it. But that’s not what happened. Think of it this way: You’re a girl who is SUPER interested in the human body and medicine. But you’ve only ever seen doctors who are men, so you have no idea that you could be a doctor. Then one day you see a doctor who’s a woman, and realize that that’s something you can actually do. You seeing a woman doctor didn’t make you interested in the human body or medicine, it just made you realize that you as a woman were allowed to be a doctor. It’s the same thing with being attracted to the same gender. It’s something that’s always a part of you, but most people just don’t realize that it’s possible or OK until they see someone else do it. This is what your parents are protecting you from when they say they’re trying to protect you by not exposing you to any same gender relationships. They may have absolutely no idea this is what they’re doing, but people don’t always realize when they’re biased. And even if they do, it’s almost impossible for them to admit it and correct their own behavior. This is what’s happening to you. You probably don’t mean to be grossed out by same gender romance, and don’t realize having friends who are attracted to the same gender doesn’t mean that you’re not biased. Admitting you’re biased is a SUUPEEEER hard thing to admit to yourself, but you can’t try to change your behavior and become a better person until you admit that you have a flaw you need to change. And being a good person means constantly trying to be a better person, even if it makes you uncomfortable in the process. Imagine if your child ends up being attracted the same gender. You wouldn’t want to stop them or discourage them from being who they are, but if you don’t try to stop yourself from being grossed out by same gender romance now, then you’re going to be grossed out by it when you see your child in a same gender romance. And I’m sure the last thing in the world you want is for your child to think that you’re grossed out by who they are. And yes, there’s a one in 10 chance that your child is going to be attracted to people of the same gender at least a little bit. The likelihood of one of your children being attracted to the same gender increases the more children you have, so there’s a VERY good chance that you will actually have to deal with this. I know it’s going to be hard, and probably scary considering there’s a chance that you may be disobeying your parents in some way, but if you really care about your friends and potential children feeling comfortable and accepted around you, then you need to start exposing yourself to this stuff and correcting your behavior now, as a child. So you don’t end up hurting someone you care about later.

        I hope that this in some way gives you a better understanding of yourself and the people around you, and will encourage you to be the accepting person it seems like you really want to be. Or even if it just helps you decide what to do about your parents and the books. Thank you for truly listening to me and considering what I have to say. That’s a very important quality to have, and people tend to lose it as they get older. I wish you the best.

          taylorofzenovia replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          <3 ^

          agathaandtedros4ever replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          and this is why i am leaving. I have a friend she has two moms ware i used to live i had 7 friends that had 2 moms or 2 dads. OK i did not mean to make a fuss on this. and @moonerell it is the same thing as lying if you don’t tell your parents whats going on in this book. Ok you choose for yourselfs what is good and what is not. I AM NOT, going to learn young that being gay is ok. i am not judgmental towards them i love them i just don’t agree with their standards. ok this is why i am leaving. i have already set my standards and i intend to keep them. Its kinda dissapionting that you guys tell me not to judge yet you guys are giving all sorts of these judgments at me.

        kikiforever replied 3 years, 4 months ago

        Not to be mean to @MOONERELL or anyone else, but I agree with @AGATHAANDTEDROS4EVER 100% I also think being gay or whatever else there is kind of wrong. I have learned the same teachings from my church and family: to love them but not be them and encourage them. So, well, yeah, I’m sooo sorry this is why you have to leave @AGATHAANDTEDROS4EVER. Thanks for reading this!!
        ~KIKI of the ForeverSeas
        <3 <3 READ ON

          taylorofzenovia replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          It doesn’t matter if you love them or not. They should be treated like normal people. Do you know why? Cause that’s what they are. Normal. People.

          taylorofzenovia replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          Also, read what Soman said because in this situation, what he said should be all that’s relevant

          llamalover replied 3 years, 4 months ago

          If it is your opinion that you are not okay with gay lesbia.n or bi people it is your opinion but it could make some people feel uncomfortable if you discriminate

        cheekychocolate replied 3 years, 4 months ago

        taylorofzenovia and Soman well said .

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