HELLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HUMANS OF THE EARTH! (and Mars) So since it’s pride month I decided to look up some LGBTQ+ songs from musicals sooooo 2-3 times a week this month I’m going to edit those songs to be SGE themed and using some pride ships OR OR OR PRIDE CHARACTERS soooo if you have any suggestions for LGBTQ+ characters or ships from SGE please comment them! Butttt for now this is my first edition, its a song called “If you were ga.y” from Avenue Q and anything bad has been edited out and its a song for Jaric….hope you enjoy these edited lyrics!
Aric: *sitting in his dorm in the Arbed House* Aah, an afternoon alone with
My favorite book, “Death by the knives.”
Aric: No roommate to bother me.
How could it get any better than this?
Japeth: *walks in* Oh,hi Aric!
Aric: *inhale* Hi Japeth.
Japeth:*grinning* Hey Aric, you’ll never
Guess what happened to
Japeth: Me on the walk here this morning.
This dude was smiling at me and talking to me
Aric: *reading* That’s very interesting.
Japeth: He was being real friendly,
And I think he was trying to flirt with me.
Japeth: *still grinning* I think he might’ve thought I was ga.y!
Aric: *pulls book down* Ahem, so, uh, why are you telling me this?
Why should I care?
Aric: *being awkward* I don’t care.
What did you have for lunch today?
Japeth: Oh, you don’t have to get
All defensive about it, Aric…
Aric: *throws book down* I’m NOT getting defensive!
What do I care about some gay dude you met, okay?
Aric: *picks book up and reads it upside down* I’m trying to read.
Japeth: Oh, I didn’t mean anything by it, Aric.
I just think it’s something we should be able to talk about.
Aric: *continues holding book the wrong way* I don’t want to talk about it,
Japeth! This conversation is over!!!
Japeth: *frowns* Yeah, but…
Aric: *throws book at him* OVER!!!
Japeth: Well, okay, but just so you know —
Japeth: *off-key scream singing* IF YOU WERE GA.Y
THAT’D BE OKAY.
Japeth: I MEAN ‘CAUSE, HEY,
I’D LIKE YOU ANYWAY.
Japeth: BECAUSE YOU SEE,
IF IT WERE ME,
Japeth: I WOULD FEEL FREE
TO SAY THAT I WAS G.AY
Japeth: *yells louder* (BUT I’M NOT GA.Y.)
Aric: *not paying attention* Japeth, please!
I am trying to read….
Aric: *realization hits* What?!
Japeth: IF YOU WERE QUEER
Aric: Ah, Japeth!
Japeth: I’D STILL BE HERE,
Aric: *Holding book upside down* Japeth, I’m trying to read this book.
Japeth: YEAR AFTER YEAR
Aric: Japeth! SHUT UP!
Japeth: BECAUSE YOU’RE DEAR
Aric: *throws book at him* Argh!
Japeth: *still scream singing* AND I KNOW THAT YOU
Japeth: *Literally just screaming he’s ga.y* WOULD ACCEPT ME TOO,
Aric: *cough* I would?
Japeth: *yelling* IF I TOLD YOU TODAY,
“HEY! GUESS WHAT,
Japeth: *yells louder* (BUT I’M NOT G.AY.)
Japeth: *punches arm* JUST BEING WITH YOU.
Japeth: *off-key yelling* SO WHAT SHOULD IT
MATTER TO ME
Japeth: WHAT YOU MAKE IN THE KITCHEN
Aric: JAPETH!, that’s GROSS! You know I hate cooking…
Japeth: *panicking* No it’s not!
IF YOU WERE GA.Y
Japeth: I’D SHOUT HOORAY!
Aric: *covers ears* I am not listening!
Japeth: *scowls* AND HERE I’D STAY,
Aric: *singing* La la la la la!
Japeth: *high level screeching* BUT I WOULDN’T GET
Japeth: *jumps him* IN YOUR WAY.
Aric: *scream* Aaaah!
Japeth: *staring him down* YOU CAN COUNT ON ME
TO ALWAYS BE
Japeth: BESIDE YOU EVERY DAY,
TO TELL YOU IT’S OKAY,
Japeth: YOU WERE JUST BORN
Japeth: AND, AS THEY SAY,
IT’S IN YOUR DNA,
Japeth: YOU’RE GA.Y!
Aric: *scream* BUT I’M NOT GA.Y
Japeth: If you were g.ay.
Aric: *sighs* Argh!
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