My Ranking Points
Okay, short lil bio for ma boi the gnome.
Name: Louross Dalrymple
Aliases/Nicknames: Lou or Ross (he is called these by his parents and others from the Schools, though always unwillingly)
Romantic Orientation: Straight
Location and Time Period: 1980s: he was born in a quaint little gnome village somewhere in the Cornish countryside. He passes freely between his original timezone and the Endless Woods, as gnome communities tend to stay tight-knit, even across fantasy realms.
Power: Can curse others with minor inconveniences and mishaps if they are being particularly irritating
Colour of Magic: Burnt umber
Fictional Relative: Destruction of the Endless (great-great-great-great-grandfather) and the gnome from Pink Floyd’s Gnome (grandfather)
Appearance: Louross is lanky, standing at around 190cm, with shoulders wrenched into a slouch by a house designed mostly for people under five feet. His skin is pale, his curls well-combed and mousy, and his eyes a dull bracken-green. When he cares enough to speak, his tone is nasally and often deadpan. His features tend to be perpetually moulded into oddly striking, dry disapproval, with arched eyebrows, jutting bones, and a rather prominent nose.
Clothes: He has been described as dressing like an “elderly hipster”, favouring various combinations of russet corduroy, crimson jumpers, flannel shirts, and strange paisley ties. (Essentially, he dresses, looks, and talks like James Acaster. Google him. Seriously.)
Personality: Louross is a fan of books, tea, and rules. Not much else. He cannot stand messy eaters, noisy neighbours, obnoxious teenagers, silly antics, or general rudeness, and will not hesitate to file a complaint when faced with such disgraceful behaviour. He finds both Schools incredibly shallow and immature and prefers to stay out of their affairs and avoid as much responsibility for students as he can. Like many of his gnome relatives, Louross considers himself home among nature, provided the nature is not attempting to kill him, and enjoys the comfort of familiarity. Unlike many of his gnome relatives, he is not exactly jocular or friendly, and tries his best to keep to himself as much as possible. The whole adventuring lark that all the kids his age seem to be into these days simply sounds like foolery to him. Much like his ancestor, Destruction, Louross is constantly attempting to subvert the destructive aspect of his blood, brewing organic coffee, baking, writing poetry, playing the flute, and sketching. Unfortunately, as has been the case with Destruction and all his descendants, it never works out quite right. He has nearly burned his cottage down at least three times while attempting to warm up a croissant.
Backstory: There was a gnome cottage just outside the bounds of the School for Good and Evil that was the cheapest on the market at the time and was situated close to a Flowerground line that spanned several major gnome settlements. To Louross, it appeared to be the perfect way to avoid his parents (a cheerful gnome miner and a rather nice human lady named Carol) and pursue his dreams of being a local baker. Unfortunately, the School was constantly expanding, and the Blue Forest rose up around his house only a few months after he moved in. Much to the dismay of his parents and the faculty, Louross refused to move. After several passive-aggressive letters, the School eventually offered to allow Louross to stay, provided he would act as a sort of groundskeeper, regulating the forest and usually making sure students did not get themselves killed. Louross grouchily agreed.