goodandevil5050 posted an update 7 months, 1 week ago

    Hello all. I have a few minutes to type here- (my parents have allowed me to go on my device, yay!)
    Not many check here anymore, and I’m glad, it’s sort of an invisibility that I prefer.
    A layer of darkness, or perhaps just a veil. The ones that check are the few that I don’t mind. Perhaps it’s a random user just seeing it. Perhaps it’s a dear…[Read more]

        lifeasabookworm replied 7 months, 1 week ago

        You are so amazing, shadow. This has taken everything in my mind and has been put into beautiful words that mean so much. This is so pure, everything you have said – Shadow, we needed this. The site needs to hear it – I wish we could have a permanent pin somewhere on the site where this post could just reside so people could think before they…[Read more]

          goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 1 week ago

          Thank you Booky. For reading it. I’m glad that it means that much to you. I’m glad.

          lifeasabookworm replied 3 months ago

          efuyegy SHADOW, SHADOW, ee, the sites sort of stagnant at the moment but goshdar, im missing u so MUCH, i was reading one of our rp doc thingies and wow, it was a year ago and like i feel so much nostalgia and like ughhh i miss u guys so much, like its a very strong feeling of longing 🙁 we havent talked in eons and ugh, i wish i could treasure…[Read more]

        twilightarrow13 replied 7 months, 1 week ago

        This… is the pure truth. And the purest truth, and the most beautiful and golden of them all. I wish more than us could just see this too- a lot of people do need to see this, like Booky said. This touched my heart… and It’s making me think more about myself and others, which I believe was your point of writing this, so good job, my friend.…[Read more]

          goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 1 week ago

          Once again, thank you for reading it. Thank you for taking it to heart. Words bhave no meaning if readers don’t express the desire to understand them. So thank you, and I’m glad you felt that way.

        ladyofthebooksge replied 5 months, 1 week ago

        This rings so true especially now…. this site is amazing, chaotic, and has wonderful people. Even though we don’t know what everyone here looks like we’re all humans with legitimate, valid emotions. Things are drifting away more and this really hits home. As @pencilpeytie said before, the site is not the destination but a bridge. So many people…[Read more]

    goodandevil5050 posted an update 7 months, 3 weeks ago

    You suck.
    I know.
    Everyone hates you.
    I know.
    You’re never going to be good enough.
    I know.
    Will you ever realize you should just die? That you’re not worth it?
    No.
    I may suck sometimes, but at least I admit I have flaws. I’m human. And sure Everone hates me, or everone doesn’t. Everyone can refer to the entire world, and trust me…[Read more]

        twilightarrow13 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

        👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 YES YOU SAID IT MISSY. *Giggles* You said it all.

          goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          I know I did! *Giggles* I kinda thought this was important. Because everyone has these thoughts.

        arnum1234 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

        NO ONE NEEDS THOUGHTS!

          goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          No one does. That is correct!!! A++++++

          arnum1234 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          Yay! I got an A!

          arnum1234 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          *to annoy shadow* I’m still awakeee

          goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          BAD SPADE. You need sleep. Hmphie.

          arnum1234 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          Spade went to bed at 5 am and awoke at 7

          goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          BAD BAD BAD SPADE. YOU NEED MORE SLEEP.

        kittybp2 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

        *I sob*
        Thank you. I really needed to read this tonight

          goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          *I hugs you tightly* I’m glad. If you ever need to talk I’m here.

        ladyofthebooksge replied 6 months, 2 weeks ago

        Thank you for posting this, those thoughts have been growing in me recently and the way you countered them are just beautiful. I needed this, more than I thought<3

        ilikelemons replied 1 week, 5 days ago

        I will miss you, Shadow.

    goodandevil5050 posted an update 7 months, 3 weeks ago

    Hello all!
    …I haven’t posted in a while and now I”m posting a chain.
    What have I become? *Giggles* But the people I mention really do deserve it. Even if I’m not on the site half the time and I’m probably the most accidental late person all times, you’ve all beared with me. Kinda- ish. I don’t know! *Giggles* Anyways, thank you! And onto the…[Read more]

        goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

        Darn it! I messed up your username Laurie. …Hmphie. Sorry! @lauren813

          lauren813 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          Aw thank you so much!!! You’ve been an amazing friend to me as well, and that rp was probably the only thing that made my summer worthy of remembrance. And for the record, I have officially adopted laurie as a nickname so thank you for that! I mean, it does seem unlikely that they will make up but… You never know with those two.

          goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          Yeah, you never know. And I’m glad! *Giggles* I gave two users their nicknames! I should be very proud!! *Giggles* And I mean it all so thank you Laurie.

        twilightarrow13 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

        *Giggles* This is also literally so, so sweet and kind and even though I was uh…. reminded of those wonderful, wonderful yet slightly irritating times, they made me laugh more than twice. I’m so, so happy to have you as my friend too. I don’t know what I’d do without you- and I’m so glad you’re always here for me. 🥰

          goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          I will be Yazzy! And now to get those irritating funny nicknames off my chessstttt- *GIggles* BasYazzy, Mother Yazzy, and most importantly. Mother BasYazzy! *Snickers* I’m sorry, I will never mention them again… today. *GIggles* I’m glad we’re friends.

        twilightarrow13 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

        Hmphie…. but so am I. :> But I do have a feeling this is not going to be close to the last time you mention those……

          goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          I said the last time yesterdayy- now it’s tomorrow and I can say them agaiiiiiin!

        lifeasabookworm replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

        omg i literally love u smmmm, shadow – u and yaz were literally the first ever site friends i had ever made, i literally knew no one before then. thank u, ill never be able to repay u for the humongous paragraphs that id make u read talking about my woes and friendship issues – thank u so much for helping me and inspiring me to become who i am…[Read more]

          goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          *Giggles* Thanks Booky. And you don’t have to repay me, that’s what friends are for. And you and Yaz were the first two that actually saw me kind of creep out of my shell and I became a lot more talkative, so I’m super thankful that you helped me too.

          shadesofevil replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          lol didn’t expect to be remembered but here we are thanks I guess

          goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          Why wouldn’t I remember you? Shade… why wouldn’t I? Your close to me.

        goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

        : )

    goodandevil5050 posted an update 8 months ago

    @lifeasabookworm,
    Booky! How are you? (Yes we haven’t talked in a while, I’m so very sorry!)

        lifeasabookworm replied 8 months ago

        I THOUGHT YOU’D FORGOTTEN ME. How are you, oml, what are you upto nowadays, how is school, how is writing, how’s life in general? I’ve missed how it used to be during the summer break over lockdown OML!!! 😭😭 I literally am busy stressing over school work and suffering from acute paranoia. I was rewatching a few episodes of the umbrella academy to…[Read more]

          goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

          Umbrella is the best tv series to watch when your mopey/panicky. But take a deep breath.

    goodandevil5050 posted an update 8 months ago

    I’m scared.
    Of what?
    Of the dark.
    …I am too.
    How do you deal with it then?
    I don’t. I ignore it.
    That’s not right. Not safe.
    Life isn’t safe. You could die by tripping.
    …But pushing it down is just another form of dying. Inside.
    No, it’s just a way of ignoring what’s not real. IUt doesn’t work always.
    When it doesn’t work,…[Read more]

        goodandevil5050 replied 7 months, 1 week ago

        I’m so very tired.
        I don’t think I have to explain my weariness. It just is.

    goodandevil5050 posted an update 8 months, 2 weeks ago

    I’m tiiiiiiiiiiiired, and crankyyyy, and so here I ask,
    How are you?
    How late do you think I generally am?
    …How awkward have i been so far? *Giggles*
    Annnnnnnnnnnnnd. Chocolate? Or Hot cocoa?
    …Would you delibrately eat ice-cream even though it’s cold because it’s yummy and the weather can go away?
    Alsoooooo, how tired can someone be?

        kittybp2 replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

        I’m okay. How are you?
        Late to what? A party
        I’m guessing pretty awkward
        HOT COCOA ALL THE WAY
        Guilty as charged
        Very very tired

          goodandevil5050 replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

          I’m okay, and late to everything. . Pretty awkward? *Giggles* Probably! Thank you! HOT COCOA IS AWESOME! Ice cream is yummy- and… yay! I have paassed that limit, have you?

          kittybp2 replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

          Nope I haven’t yet!

          goodandevil5050 replied 8 months, 1 week ago

          Okay, good! Get some rest! (if you’re tired)

        twilightarrow13 replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

        Iiiiiiii aaaam tiiiiiired, and just,,……. eeeeehhhh- I don’t even know anymore. L.mao I’m just so tired I don’t even know hahaha. We both need to question our sleeping standards 😂😂
        Hm……… lateness- ….I actually think you’re pretty on time to things for the most part ehehe.
        Youuuu haven’t been awkward, silly! You’re just… being the…[Read more]

          goodandevil5050 replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

          *Giggles* YOU BETTER HAVE GOTTEN SOME REST YAZZY! *Giggles*

        twilightarrow13 replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

        I am just so- …snsjsaiaaokdsjsn okay-
        1) starred out word is s.crewed
        2) getting*
        3) eggs*

    goodandevil5050 posted an update 8 months, 2 weeks ago

    Do you ever feel like dying?
    How can I feel like dying? …I’m not dead.
    Because in your soul. You’re dead. In you’re heart. It’s broken. But you’re still smiling. Smiling. Smiling.
    ….That’s correct. But is it dying? …At least in dying you have relief. It seems more like life. Torturing you by keeping you awake in your agony.
    But……[Read more]

        goodandevil5050 replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

        Also… further analysis, for those who understand.
        The thoughts in itailics are some that were in the past (whether recently or not), and the ones that weren’t are thoughts, or things I would say now, or wish someone had said to me.

        twilightarrow13 replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

        *Hugs you tightly* This… I love it. I love it so much. Thank you for that beautiful piece… thank you. <3

          goodandevil5050 replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

          *Hugs you back tightly* I’m glad!

    goodandevil5050 posted an update 9 months, 1 week ago

    I’m scared.
    Of what?
    Disappearing.
    Well don’t be scared. Everyone has to disappear. That way someone else can appear.
    But I don’t want to go.
    Not yet.
    …but I don’t get to choose when I can go.
    You don’t. But disappearing won’t hurt. In fact, you’ll hardly remember.
    How can you say that?
    Because I hope. When you finally get a…[Read more]

        pinker13 replied 9 months, 1 week ago

        *huggles* (unless you don’t like hugs)

          goodandevil5050 replied 9 months, 1 week ago

          *Huggles* (I will never not like hugs) Thanks Pink.

        twilightarrow13 replied 9 months, 1 week ago

        :> Wow. That short little excerpt was so eye-opening. And it’s so wonderful and bittersweet. I love it so much. *Giggles and hugs you tightly* You can have a mystical way with your words, drawing a parallel between all of our minds, and our hearts, Shadow.

          goodandevil5050 replied 9 months, 1 week ago

          I’m glad you liked it! It was kind of fun to do this.

        goodandevil5050 replied 9 months, 1 week ago

        Why say sorry? It’s fine! I just have the strangest thoughts sleep-deprived.

        arnum1234 replied 7 months, 3 weeks ago

        *spoe*

    goodandevil5050 posted an update 9 months, 3 weeks ago

    For one to win- the other must lose.

    …A tragedy for one, a victory for the other.

    But of course, only the winning side writes history.

        cutenesslily replied 9 months, 2 weeks ago

        holy gucamole ur right

        ladyofthebooksge replied 9 months, 2 weeks ago

        ^^^^^^

        cocostar replied 9 months, 2 weeks ago

        ‘History is told by it’s survivors’

        lifeasabookworm replied 9 months ago

        I have this quote from pinterest in my activity but it is summoned here ” until the lions learn to write, the story will always glorify the hunters” i think it went like that.

          cocostar replied 9 months ago

          I know that one!

          goodandevil5050 replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

          That… is such an awesome quote- and I’m late again. Yayyyyy.

    goodandevil5050 posted an update 10 months ago

    Sometimes I wish conversations never ended. Then we’d never have to say goodbye.

        pinker13 replied 10 months ago

        😥

          goodandevil5050 replied 9 months, 4 weeks ago

          Yeah- I’m in hybrid. Every other day I have school, wbu? Life’s okay.

        goodandevil5050 replied 10 months ago

        Fine- I was just… tiiiiiiiired. And tired me does things like that, how are you doing?

        goodandevil5050 replied 9 months, 4 weeks ago

        …Like insiiiiiide? I dunnno. I’m aliiive, that counts for something. And online does suck- god last April was a nightmare. What about you? How are you like inside?

        effie replied 9 months, 4 weeks ago

        (Unsatisfyingest answer ever.)

        effie replied 9 months, 3 weeks ago

        What?
        I mean, it’s the last sentence of the third book, but in response to that question, it’s extremely unsatisfying.

        effie replied 9 months, 3 weeks ago

        I don’t know. Um. Something?

        goodandevil5050 replied 9 months, 3 weeks ago

        Lol, it kinda is unsatsifying but it’s also an answer. YOu’re you. You’ll always be you. (Unless you’re an alien taking control of Poet’s body) Anyways- inside? My heart? Eh- I mean I think it’s scarred- but it’s almost hole, jsut missing some pieces. (Haha- i’m so so late.

        effie replied 9 months, 2 weeks ago

        XD

        cocostar replied 9 months, 2 weeks ago

        If conversations never ended new ones would never begin.

          effie replied 9 months, 2 weeks ago

          Meh. A conversation can change to a totally different subject. In which case, the conversation would not have ended, but what feels like a totally new one will have begun.

          pinker13 replied 9 months, 2 weeks ago

          Yeah

          goodandevil5050 replied 9 months, 1 week ago

          …That’s a really good reason.

          cocostar replied 9 months, 1 week ago

          Not really. If we continued conversations we’d die from lack of sleep.

          cocostar replied 9 months, 1 week ago

          Thank you!
          If conversations never ended you’d never meet new people, make new friends!

          effie replied 9 months, 1 week ago

          You could take breaks from a conversation, of course. And you could have multiple conversations at once.

          cocostar replied 9 months, 1 week ago

          Multiple is very tiring and demanding for some.
          The break wouldn’t be long enough for sleep.

        cocostar replied 9 months, 2 weeks ago

        That was an unsatisfying reply.

        cocostar replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

        :))))
        I have hommmeewwwoooorrkkkk.
        The ceiling.

        cocostar replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

        You’re so luckkyyyyyyyy
        I have 7 assignments to doooooo

        pinker13 replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

        The amount is overwhelming. I won’t tell you how behind I am. The sky or in this case, the ceiling!

          cocostar replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

          I get you. During lockdown I just completely gave up and did not do my homework because the amount of work I had stressed me out.

          pinker13 replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

          Yeah *sighs*

          cocostar replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

          *also sighs*

        effie replied 8 months, 2 weeks ago

        I’m fine. Good. Better. Decent. I have homework to do but I’m procrastinating and telling myself I’m just catching up with my friends.

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