My Ranking Points
Hi! So, so sorry I’ve been MIA for the last few weeks, lots has come up and I’ve just struggled finding the energy to write. But I’m back now, and I hope it isn’t awful! I’m doing my best to catch up on reading all of the chapters I missed, but the ‘load more’ button is stubborn, so if I accidentally miss any part of your story, it is not intentional and I am very sorry. I should be posting for the Zodiac RP in a few days as I am almost done with my separate timeline bio. Enjoy!
It wasn’t a rainy, dreary day like Cali had thought. There wasn’t dramatic, swelling music like she’d been promised. One second they were walking, moving forward with strange balance of awkward banter and silence, and the next Andros was setting him down and the ground, holding his breath. Tasman’s breaths were coming out in wheezing gasps, faster than they had been before. Cali could see the snaking patterns of wood arching over the collar of his shirt, the patterns she had been dreaming about at night and trying to forget during the day.
“Tasman, we can keep going!” Brantler looked at Tasman like no one had in a while; with anger. Tasman was sick and tired of the soft, pitying looks, the hallow touches like he was a balloon that needed to be tethered to the earth or he would float away and disappear. “We’ll run! There’s gotta be a town nearby, someone can-“
They all looked at their feet, unable to even glance at Tasman as he waited. “Just,” he paused. “Good…bye.”
It wasn’t a question, though it felt like one. He didn’t want to die- No, not die, freeze, Cali reminded herself- suspended in the air and walking through a forest. And this was it. She wasn’t sure how he could feel it, but he could. He was done holding on, done waiting in agony for time to catch up and rap her cold fingers over his eyes. He was done imagining her as a girl almost like Cali, hoping she let him hold his face and whispered something funny as the scene faded to black. He was done reminding himself that we all had to die sometimes, and for him, there happened to be a ***** in the armor, some unresolved karma. No, he could lay here in the grass and let his friends look at him with pity as he choked out final breaths. No more pretending that nothing was awful, or that there was nothing to fear. This was it.
Brantler knelt beside his friend, the one who had forced himself into his life and his bedroom after an ‘accidental’ fire and deserved so much better than this. “Are you sure?”
The veins in Tasman’s forehead bulged, and his chin slid, just slightly, down his neck.
“Well…best of luck.”
Brantler stepped away, head down, letting Andros move in towards the boy. “I’m really sorry, Tas.”
He turned without waiting for a response, standing next to Brantler. The others- Zathreen, Rachel, Bree, Piper and Jared- stepped forwards and said their impersonal goodbyes. Rachel, clutching Piper’s hand like it was keeping her tethered to the earth, realized with shame how little most of them had known Tasman.
Bree looked at her friend’s blank expression and pushed her towards Tasman.
Cali felt like the world was spinning faster but somehow everyone but her was still holding on. The ground was shifting and all of the rules were changing but all she could focus on was Tasman in front of her, searching the world around him for air.
“Cali of Everywhere.”
She smiled a little despite herself. “We’ll find it, you know.”
He nodded, too tired to tell her he doubted there was anything to find.
“We’ll leave you at the school and keep going into the woods and we’ll find it an we’ll come back for you.”
Tasman doubted anyone could get used to being talked about like an object rather than a person. And if they could, they didn’t do it with the knowledge that soon they would be an object.
Cali was quiet for a minute. She’d taken his wooden hand, though he couldn’t feel it to know.
“This s*cks. It really, freaking s*cks.”
He choked a little on the laugh that bubbled up.
“I like you, Cali.” It was stupid, really, his big, poetic, secret-revealing last words.
She smiled a bit, and squeezed his hand. “I like you too, Tas.”
And the wood warped and quivered and shook and absorbed him, leaving a doll where there had once been a boy.
Piper stood alone, trying to separate herself from the unshakable grief that threatened to overtake their teeny tiny band. It wasn’t like she deserved to mourn or feel sad for someone she’d barely known. She watched Rachel, watched Rachel watching Cali cry numbly into Brees arms. Rachel’s forehead was creased, her eyes slightly downcast, like she didn’t want anyone to know she was looking. But it was clear that she was hurting.
Not entirely aware of what she was doing, Piper began walking slowly towards her friend. There was an ache inside of her she couldn’t quite interpret. Rachel had lost her brother so young, and then her twin and best friend not a year ago. Watching others grieve for someone they love must have hurt.
A leaf crunched beneath her foot and Rachel looked up and away from the broken girl. A light smile danced on her face when she saw Piper, but her eyes remained sad and felt a pulling in her gut. Trying to think of something to say, Piper fiddled with her fingers, not noticing Rachel’s shoulders wring of their tension at the sight of the familiar tick. Before she could speak, Rachel’s arms were around her and her heart nearly stopped beating. Rachel was just so soft and her hair grazed Piper’s nose.
“Are you okay?”
And then Rachel was glancing up at her with tear stained eyes and then Piper was leaning down as if her body weren’t her own and then they were kissing almost reverently, and if this were Andros or anyone else Piper would have parted her lips and moved in deeper but this was Rachel she was kissing, Rachel who was kissing her. Then Piper gasped and leaned out, pulsing with impulses to run and to lean in and keep kissing her. “I’m sorry I just…” Wanted to make her feel better? Wanted to hold her hand and tell her it was okay until she stopped crying? Wanted it to be Andros who was by her side, hurting?
Or wanted, desperately, with every fiber of her being, to kiss Rachel and weave her hands into her hair and just hold her forever?
“No, it’s…” Rachel seemed smaller somehow, less. “It’s okay.”
And she looked back up at Piper, shaking a little, and let herself smile again. She grabbed her friend’s hand as Piper slowly began to return the smile, and lowered herself down silently to sit in the damp grass. Piper followed her down and their fingers stayed knit as she tried to comprehend the ballooning ecstasy in her chest.
Oh, wow. I really felt the power in this scene! I love how well you illustrated that! Please, teach me your ways; every time I try to write a big, dramatic, serious scene, I royally mess it up and end up giving the entire scene 0 impact on the reader. 🙂
heyy @impossiblegirl ! do you still come onto the site every now and then, because your ranking points keep going up! Also, this is really good! eloise xx