My Ranking Points
IM NOT DEADDDDDD
(well actually I sorta am but I’m working on it)
Sorry this took so long!!!!
ALSO, LISTEN TO HEATHERS
SGE reacts 😉
Tell me if you’d like to be tagged or untagged 🙂
Today’s react is… Heathers, the musical
For those of you who haven’t heard of Heathers, here is the link to a playlist with all the songs on YouTube.
NOTE: expect a part 2 later
Sophie: seriously I don’t understand Veronica at all. I mean, she literally falls in love with a psychopathic murderer that looks hot after meeting him a few times.
Me: …I think you understand Veronica a lot more then you think you do…
Hester: *brandishes knife* Welcome to my candy storeeeee!
Dot: We sell fresh chocolate too!
Me: Anddddd welcome back to SGE reacts! Today’s react is… Heathers, the musical! Featuring…Hester, Hester, and Hesterrrrrr!
Dot: but I thought Hester was one person??
Me: she is. I was trying to make a joke there.
Anadil: A lame joke.
Hester: a joke that was dumb and made no sense.
Me: *sighs* What I was trying to do was sort of switch out the word ‘Heather’ with the word ‘Hester’
Me: ‘Her dad is loaded-he sells engagement rings’
Anadil: lame joke.
Me: ‘No discernible personality but her mom did play for implants’
Me: ‘the almighty, she is a mythic bish’
Dot: I still don’t get it.
Me: *sympathetically pats Dot on the back* You’ll see…
What actually happened in book two
Rafal: *watches Heathers*
Rafal: *appears as Vanessa* Hope you’ll miss me, wish you’d kiss me…
Sophie: *kisses him*
Rafal: *channeling inner Jefferson* IM BACK!!!!
Sophie: *lots of high pitched screaming in a very fake French accent*
Agatha: I don’t really like my friends…
Tedros: …Neither do I
HESTERS, a musical
Act One: SGE High School’s most elite clique, The Hesters (also known as Coven 66), are the coolest but cruelest kids at SGE High. When emo/goth/nerd Agatha manages to get the Hesters out a week of detention, they offer her a spot in their group (Beautiful). The catch? She has to ditch her ‘fake’ kinda air headed and blonde friend Sophie. When she basically fails at this, the Hesters make her prove her worth by forging a love note in Hort’s (a rich ****) handwriting inviting Sophie to his homecoming party. Agatha agrees and writes the note (CandyStore). After school, Agatha witnesses a fist fight between **** and rude bully Aric and a mysterious but handsome boy without a mother, Tedros(Fight For Me). Later on her way to Hort’s homecoming party, Agatha meets Tedros again at a 7/11 store (Freeze Your Brain ). Later at the party, Sophie shows up and manages to completely embarrass herself. Agatha rushes to defend her friend(Big Fun ). After the party Agatha feels bad for ‘betraying’ the Hesters by defending Sophie. So she and Tedros go over to the main Hester’s house and tries to apologize. It does not go well. Finally, Hester orders Agatha to get her a cup of orange juice. Tedros pours some orange colored soap into a cup and gives it to Agatha telling her it’s Hester’s orange juice. Agatha believes him and gives the chemical concoction to Hester. Hester promptly dies. Worried that no one will believe that she made a mistake and didn’t mean to poison Hester, Agatha (with the help of Tedros) writes a elaborate suicide note. However, the suicide note in which “brainless doll” Hester admits that in reality she did not survive the problems and hardships of this world, and realized that she has no more place in this world, making everyone think that that she was really just a misunderstood and insecure girl (The Me inside of Me ). Later on, after Hester’s funeral, the remaining Hester’s (Hester Dot and Hester Anadil) try to hold a meeting with Agatha about what to do next. However, this meeting is cut short when a very ***** Hort and a even drunker Aric (cause he had to do something so he’s *****), try to attack them and smash Hester Anadil’s car windows. Hester Anadil and Hester Dot manage to escape Hort and Aric by telling them they can have Agatha as a punching bag. Agatha is saved when Tedros shows up with more wine which the two of them give to Hort and Aric who pass out. Tedros plans to get revenge on Hort and Aric for trying to beat up Agatha by shooting them. Tedros tells Agatha that the bullets are tranquilizer and asks her to arrange a meeting with Hort and Aric. She arranges the meeting and she and Tedros shoot Aric. Only then does she realize that the bullets are real. She refuses to shoot a terrified Hort, but Tedros shoots him anyway. Then, Tedros declares his undying love to a horrified Agatha (Our Love Is God ).
Act Two: Tedros forges a suicide note in Aric’s handwriting saying that Aric and Hort killed themselves because they were gay. This leads the entire student body (lead by odd professor August Sader) to endorse anti suicide amongst the students of SGE high (Shine A Light). During a school wide discussion Professor Sader asks if any of the students have ever had suicidal thoughts. Hester Dot is the only one who admits to feeling constantly pressured and has considered killing herself (LifeBoat). Once the school wide discussion is over, Hester Anadil mocks Hester Dot for admitting that she had suicidal thoughts. With the encouragement of Hester Anadil, the other students begin to make fun of Hester Dot. This leads to Hester Dot running to the girls bathroom and trying to kill herself by overdosing. Agatha manages finds her right before she swallows the pills and convinces her not to go through with her death. The next day, right after Hort and Aric’s funeral, where Hort’s dad admits that he two is homosexual (I love my Dead Gay son), Sophie tells Agatha that she doesn’t think that Hort and Aric killed themselves because they couldn’t have been gay. Sophie then pulls out her evidence, the love letter inviting Sophie to Hort’s homecoming party that Agatha had forged. Agatha, feeling bad, tries to explain to her friend that it was her who wrote the note. Heartbroken and furious, Sophie severs her friendship with Agatha. Later that night, Sophie jumps off a bridge in a suicide attempt but survives with a few broken bones (Kindergarten Boyfriend). Hester Anadil proclaims her failed suicide as an attempt to imitate the popular kids. Agatha (accompanied by the ghosts of Hester, Hort, and Aric) rushes to the hospital where Sophie is staying. She realizes that she has become as evil and cruel as Hester (Yo Girl). Agatha decides that the way to stop all of this is to confront Tedros and stop him from killing anyone else. She goes back to her house and is greeted by her worried mother who tells her that her friend Tedros had told her the Agatha has been depressed. Agatha’s mom (Callis) implores her daughter to talk to her. Agatha (still surrounded by the ghosts of Hester, Hort, and Aric), realizes that she is Tedros’s next target. She runs into her room. Tedros climbs through her bedroom window and tells her that he’s taking her as her date to the pep rally at SGE highschool. Agatha shoves him out of her room and locks the door only to hear him beg her to let him in (Meant To Be Yours). He explains about his new plan. Instead of murdering the students one by one, he’ll set up a bomb that will explode during the pep rally killing all the students. Tedros has also forged a suicide note supposedly written by the student body of SGE high. When Agatha refuses to let Tedros in, he eventually slams open the door only to discover that Agatha has hanged herself using a curtain. Tedros is heartbroken but decides to still go on with his plan to blow up SGE high school. Agatha, who is actually not dead and has faked her hanging, goes to the pep rally determined to stop Tedros. She arrives just in time to see Tedros about to finish setting up the bomb. She grabs the bomb and tries to run away but Tedros threatens to shoot her. She reluctantly drops the bomb. Then, she tackles Tedros and grabs his gun. When he refuses to defuse the bomb, Agatha ends up shooting him in the leg. He survives though. As a final act of manipulation, he decides to sacrifice himself and save the student body by taking the bomb out towards the school’s football field. Agatha begs him to stay but he refuses. Finally, she says, “Say hi to God.” letting Tedros die. The next day everyone at SGE high is buzzing about the bomb that got set off on the football field at the pep rally. Sick of all the gossip, Agatha proclaims that there will be no more Heathers. She then invites Sophie and Dot over to watch movie and just have a good time before they grow up (Seventeen Reprise ).
Kiko: I LOVE MY DEAD GAY SON
Reena: I thought you loved Tristan…
Reena: wait so Tristan was gay?
Kiko: I KNOW RIGHT? WE WERE PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER!
The KikoxAgatha ship: YES EXACTLY TRISTAN WAS GAY
Rhian: I was meant to be yours!
Sophie: hmm seems legit.
Rhian: We were meant to be one!
Sophie: *gets engaged to Rhian*
Rhian: SO WHEN THE HIGH SCHOOL GYM GOES BOOM!
At the end of book 3:
Merlin: *in Tim Gunn voice* why Agatha, you look like heII!
Agatha: *bleeding, muddy, and her hair is messed up* yA I just got back.
Tedros: FREEZE YOUR BRAINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
Agatha: Don’t listen to he’s got mommy issues.
Well that was…interesting XD?
Onto the Be More Chill reacts!!! (After I make a part two but that’s only if I make a part two and I’m lazy so ya…)
Also what did you guys think of the Hesters idea? It could be a full length AU…but I might tweak it like, A LOT more. And switch some roles. I was a bit hesitant to make Tedros the JD character but it’s not I could have anyone else as Agatha’s soulmate.
Tell me what you guys think 🙂
This is hilarious! 😀 A friend of mine sort of dragged me to their school to watch his boyfriend perform in a year-end play **** of “Heathers” in their school, and I immediately watched the original afterwards because I loved the plot so much hahaha <3 Can't wait for more!
That was really smart :). I just think it would make more sense if Sophie was the Veronica character. Than Rafal could be JD. Also, Sophie DOES Join the Coven at one point, at the end of book one. Agatha, who Sophie ditches when she joins the coven in book 1, would make the perfect Martha. (she is also not considered beautiful). I LOOOOVEEED the react! I like Heathers a lot. I’m not really sure how you are going to do be more chill, what with the SQUIPs and all, but It would be cool.
It must be very hard to write a post this long, I love your work, amazing job!!!
I’m somewhat into the Heathers and I like the songs. My only problem with it, is that it’s really for adults and high schoolers. I’m SO GLAD that you’re doing Be More Chill. I feel the same way about Be More Chill as with the Heathers. I’m SO happy that you’re doing all of these reacts of all my favorite musicals like, Hamilton, Dear Evan Hansen, The Heathers, and now Be More Chill!!
There is actual proof that Tristan is gay Soman said it on a video hA
I actually read several different versions of the musicals synopsis and the plot of the musical. I actually ended up modifying it like, a lot cause the original plot (and some of the songs) are pretty much complete inappropriate for the younger people on this website (that’s why I didn’t include some the songs in the synopsis).